After seeing Am I Evil's line: Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you? on the Completely Obvious Observations thread; I decided to make this. I need to hit it off with girls, and we all know pick-up lines work great, so post; my social life with people of the opposite gender depends on it!!!

Ok, some magic pick-up lines for you:

You wanna do some math? We'll add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and multiply.

That sweater looks very becoming on you. Of course, if I was on you I'd be coming too.

I lost my phone number, can I have yours?

Remember my name 'cause you'll be screaming it later.

Those pants have a mirror? Cause I can see myself in them.

Nice shirt, wanna f**k?

Those are SURE to win you some points!

Don't listen to anything in the above post.

"prepare to be sexually unsatisfied"

Yeah, that's some real magic.

"Are those astronaut pants? 'Cause your butt is outta this world!"

As DLR used to say... How's about a hot dog and a shake?

Scream out, "FAT PENGUIN!!"


.....just to break the ice

"The word of the day is legs....lets go back to my place and spread the word"

"hello, I am a frustrated 25 year old, wanna do it?"

Works every time.

Nice legs, what time do they open?

"Mind if I slide in here and get a drink?"

Might not be the "ultimate" pick-up line, but it worked well enough to land the girl that would eventually become Mrs. MetalGuy71.

By the way, that line will only work at a crowded bar. Don't try it at church, the local YMCA or the Emergency Room.

I always used: "Um... hi."

Wow, that dress looks nice. I bet it would look even better at the foot of my bed!

Hi, I'm *insert name*. Shall we shower before, or after?

Oh yeah. These will all go over great. I can tell.

"How 'bout them Pirates?"

A buddy and I were in Pittsburgh and thought this would be a great pick-up line. Of course, we were too afraid to try!

My best friend is wheelchair-bound, and when we were in college, he had a line picked out: "I WOULD ask you out, but I'm handicapped".

Man, that one 'bout sent me to the floor.

I'm unemployed and I drive an electric car.

How do you like your eggs - scrambled or fertilized?

Would you like to have breakfast with me? How should I wake you, call you or tap you?

Should I call you in the morning or just roll over and nudge you?